To say adopting is filled with obstacles is an understatement! We are still so early in the process and yet we have come in contact with obstacles a plenty. Here are some, and how we are handling them, or what we are doing about them and in some cases suggestions if you want them.
1. Money! I think this is probably the single biggest reason families who might be compelled to adopt end up not going through with it. We are very blessed with friends and families who are very supportive of us financially. Also when we bring Danny home (finally!) our respective companies will provide us a small amount of assistance. Are you thinking about adopting, but can't pull the trigger because of money? Check with your employer, many times they offer adoption benefits that are never used because no one knows about them!
2. Paperwork! Whew. This is a doozy. I have a huge file folder that is already completely full of the paperwork that adoption requires of us. And yet there are still missing items at this point. Our homestudy won't be complete until we get our FBI back-ground checks back, our medical statements, as well as our psychological statements. You read that right, we have to be evaluated psychologically in order to adopt! With both of us working more than full time jobs right now this is far and away the most daunting obstacle we have faced so far. It has taken a significant amount of time to go to doctor's appointments, get forms signed, notaries, apostilles.
3. Nay-Sayers! While completely expected this is still quite frustrating. Wes and I have been very lucky that we have been quite shielded from this, but it still happens. I am finding that our new "adoption friends" are enduring much more of this than I think is appropriate. We know that adoption of a child with special needs is controversial but the questions that come are incredibly exhausting and most of the time RUDE. If you want to know why we are adopting...ask. If you have a question that you think *might* be offensive it probably is. If you still want to know the answer...ask, but don't be surprised if you get an answer you don't like.
4. Time! I am not a patient person. Adoption takes a long time. Things do not move quickly and most of them are out of our control. There aren't a lot of things we can do to speed this process up other than pray. So we are spending this waiting time praying, fundraising, making new friends and praying! (Yes, I know I put that last one in twice. We do it a lot.) If anyone has any suggestions on this one they would be appreciated!
So those are the current obstacles. This is not a complete list by any means, just what we are dealing with now. Again, any questions let me know and I will do my best. Thanks for your prayers!